For example, after an argument had occurred, somebody suggested that we might cool off with a round of Blood Marys, leading to a conversation between me and Jamie Slater on the Burning Man New York list:
Joseph Dunphy : Bloody Mary? No. (Salty Vodka drinks! Bleh!) A nice sherry? Yes! Jamie Slater : Sherry? I just cant drink something called that, Isn't sherry like......... ripple? There is something to be said for a good Margarita though. he he he. Joseph Dunphy : Grrrrrr .... Sherry is NOTHING like Ripple. It is a class of wines, some quite excellent, from the Jerez region of Spain. A sherry is a blended, oxidized, fortified wine with excellent keeping qualities, which means that even the inexpensive sherries can be quite pleasant drinking. (The fortification is done with brandy, not with grain alcohol, as with some of those evil fake "wines" I've seen). Ripple? (grumble) No tapas for this lady. Jamie Slater : he he he. Ripple. There's a sign in front of a little park in the East Village that says: Joseph Dunphy : Perhaps, but how would they ever get the hors d'oevre table in there? Philip Darnowshy : I have a dream, that some day vodka drinkers and beer drinkers, hardened lushes and lightweights, will all gather together for a friendly drink. I have a dream that someday drinkers will not be judged by the contents of their livers, but by their willingness to get the next round. Joseph Dunphy : I don't know, Phil. It's a beautiful dream, of love and inebriated I don't know. I just don't know. |
Ripple is an
early version of that nasty fake wine-in-a-box that I keep seeing,
right?People thought we were serious. I'm not kidding, there were people out there who thought that this was a flamewar, and thought that I had declared a jihad against vodka drinkers. I couldn't help but wonder if drugs were involved here.
I found myself wondering that a lot, such as when I met Tara Ball. The first time I saw her in person, I was a little concerned that she might be suffering from sunstroke or dehydration. "What makes you think that ?", somebody asked. "Look at her", I said, "the sweat is pouring out of her, she looks like she's about to collapse, she seems dazed and confused, her breath is shallow, the blood has drained from her face ..." "Don't worry", came the response, "she's always like that".
Oh my God! When looking half-dead is the norm for somebody, usually something has gone seriously, maybe even dangerously amiss. This much should be common sense. That wasn't the first time that I had run into her, though, and had been given cause to wonder about her, in one way or another. She had started an e-mail conversation with me which, as one might expect, proved to be a strange experience. In the dead of night, as I was about to log off, I received an omenous sounding letter from this person who I had never heard of before:
j, a shower in our camp is dangerous business. xxxT |
On Wed, 15 Aug 2001, taraball wrote:> .. j, > > .. a shower in our camp is dangerous business. How so? OK, you've got my attention. 1. Which camp are you in? |
> .. > .. j,> > .. How so? it's just not safe where do you live? |
On Wed, 15 Aug 2001, taraball wrote : > .. > .. > .. a shower in our camp is dangerous business.> .. > .. How so? > .. it's just not safe > > .. where do you live? Chicago. Not exactly Mayberry, now is it? So tell me, I can handle it. What is the nature of the danger? Are we talking about the barrel falling, and breaking my neck or skull? Are we talking about me getting raped in the shower? Are we talking about somebody yanking open the shower stall, while the rest of the camp applaudes? What? Don't worry, I'm not going to freak out. Just tell me. Joe PS. Why do I get the feeling that you're just playing with my head? If there's a real danger here that I'm not being told about, like nasty chemicals being put in the water drums, please tell me. If not, what is the point of your letter? |
> .. Don't worry, I'm not going to freak out. Just tell me. part of the danger is just now knowing exactly what might happen. Curtain? Are you kidding? There are no "curtains". You are already showering in front of the whole world. It those cold breezes that get you. cxxxT |
On Wed, 15 Aug 2001, taraball wrote : > .. part of the danger is just now knowing exactly what might happen. Is that it? I'm planning on going nude, during practically the entire Or are you referring to something else? Look, it is now 1:15 am my time. I am going to bed, soon. If you have a |
> .. Is that it? I'm planning on going nude, during practically the entire yeah, well I think you better plan on bringing some warm clothes, some fun warm clothes. I doubt you will be naked the entire festival. You will freeze your ass off. It gets fucking cold at night. Really cold. Temp on playa varies considerabley to that of nearby towns. I am refering to something else. We are quite bored with Nude Men at Camp Torch Job. xxxT |
On Wed, 15 Aug 2001, taraball wrote: > .. I am refering to something else. And that something else would be what? If I don't get a solid answer this > .. We are quite bored with Nude Men at Camp Not as bored as I am with this adolescent bullshit. I called your bluff, and you couldn't even come up with a good fantasy, much less a legitimate danger, so stop wasting my time. |
Solid Answer? you are demanding a solid answer? What was the question? oh yea, dangerous. You really need to work on developing a keener sense of humor sweetie pie. and oil up those cranky valves. Imagine if I were trying to flirt,...xxxT |
On Wed, 15 Aug 2001, taraball wrote : > .. Solid Answer? you are demanding a solid answer? What was the I do have a sense of humor, and it comes into play whenever something > .. and oil up those cranky valves. Imagine if I were Imagine if I were not receptive. If you're male, you're wasting your time, because I'm straight. If you're female, then you don't have a clue as to what it is, that I prize in a woman. Intelligence and a considerate attitude rank highly. I want somebody worthy of the kind of respect, that I have always bestowed upon those I've loved. Lacking that, why does anything else matter, and what could there be in you, that would make me want to flirt? Oh, and I have no intention of staying at camp flaming-whatever. Here it is, 1 : 45 am, and the only story I have to tell of all of this, is of one of the lamest pranks I've ever seen. The punch line is delivered without style. There is no dramatic build up, because the pointless end is telegraphed several posts ahead, meaning that the gag falls flat. There is, in short, no point, and you have done the most unforgivable thing that a person can do at this hour. You have bored me. Goodnight. |
> .. Not as bored as I am with this adolescent bullshit. I called your bluff, you seem hostile. no need to be. This is email. this is burning man and it is supposed to be fun. I will never tire of adolescent bullshit as I refuse to be an adult. Hope you are happy all grown up grumpy and not wasting anyones time. I am in no way compelled share my fanatasies w/such negativity and plan to be overlooking many bluffs. Hoping to share a the beautiful community of BRC w/you so we can learn and grow and love. xxxT |
The next day, I felt sorry for Tara, and wrote back in a friendlier tone, trying to get her to see reason. A wasted effort ...
On Wed, 15 Aug 2001, taraball wrote : > .. > .. Not as bored as I am with this adolescent bullshit. I called your bluff, > .. you seem hostile. no need to be. Sigh. Tara, it was 1:15 in the morning, my time, and you were crying "wolf". Some of us like to go to sleep earlier than that. Usually, I like to be up at 5 am, to watch the sunrise, and even 11 pm is late for me. OK, my schedule is unusual, and you couldn't have known that. But 1:15 am is still pretty late for most people. If you bother people when they're tired, you get a nasty response. If you're looking for a sense of humor, write when people are still awake. > .. This is email. No, this is me. I'm a real flesh-and-blood human being here on the other end. I wish you would remember that. > .. this is burning man and Yes, it is. It's supposed to be fun for all of us. Part of the fun, is knowing that there's a time and a place for everything. Remember, there is no sound on this net. I can't see your face. If you came up to me in person, all mock seriousness and forced deadpan, and wanted to talk to me about the unspeakable dangers of your camp, I probably would have played along, or at least said, "tomorrow, Tara, I'm too tired, right now". But online, all I can see are your literal words, and next to no context. All that I see is some vague reference to "danger", and all that I can do is wonder where on earth this is going. That's why we use smileys. :) You know? > .. I will never tire of adolescent bullshit as I Child-like, in the sense of full of wonder and enthusiasm is wonderful. Childish, in the sense of not thinking of others, is bad. Which of these do you choose ? Adulthood isn't all bad. > .. Hope you are happy all grown up grumpy and not I'm not sure what you mean by "happy", but, yes, I do try to be considerate. > .. I am in no way compelled share my fanatasies w/such Overlooking many bluffs? > .. Hoping to share a the The thought is appreciated. I'm really not an ogre, just a bear. Don't mess with me when I'm ready to go into hibernation, OK? |
This, in the Never-Neverland that is the Burning Man netforums, became the harsh and brutal attack I had carried out on Tara in private. Give me a break. The woman's behavior was bizarre and the sum total of my "brutal response", that night, was to tell her to stop bothering me. Anybody who thinks that's a horrible thing to have done to poor Tara has a lot of growing up to do.
What I found to be truly annoying, as the rumors of this and other "horrific" attacks spread, were the attitudes of so many burners I would encounter online. They would form unshakable opinions about what had 'really' happened, without feeling the need to even read the letters in question for themselves, first, or hear the other side of the story. Rumors became dogma, the very suggestion that they might be misleading being reacted to as if it were heresy.
As I found, that tended to happen a lot in these forums ...
